Talk-Free Relationship Fix #56: Self-Care

Want to improve your relationship? Run. Not away, of course. I just mean go for a run. In an earlier post, I wrote about the importance of knowing when to end a conversation. Sometimes, more talk isn’t the best solution to your romantic troubles. When I posted that article, I was already drawing on the considerable evidence that being in a high stress (“fight or flight”) state while discussing your relationship usually does more harm than good. This week I’ve been thinking a lot about some of the latest stress response research I heard cited at a conference a few weeks ago.

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Survival of the Funniest: Humor and Attraction

A journalist recently interviewed me about the link between humor and attraction. You probably guessed there’s some connection, but did you know just how strong it is? There’s actually a wealth of research devoted to this subject, and the article above mentions just a few of the highlights Bottom line: in dating—and in life—a sense of humor can only help.

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Re-Storing Love: Out of Sight Never Means Out of Mind

Keep getting angry, sad, or anxious in the same way—at work and in love? Try clearing out the bric-a-brac. I don’t mean the dusty old lamp foisted on you when great Auntie Alice passed away last winter; nor do I mean the plastic singing fish your mother slipped into a moving crate, years ago when you packed for college (that’s right—I know you have a singing fish). I’m talking about emotional bric-a-brac.

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One of the Top Questions I’m Asked: Answered Below

I’ve lost count of the number of clients and journalists who’ve asked me this one: Should people date while depressed? At a glance, the number last year looks like ten times from the press, alone, (eleven if you count, “Should people date while unemployed?”—in some ways, a variation on the same question, considering how often unemployment seems to coincide with depression).

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What Prevents You from Growing as a Person?: My Back

I’ve noticed a rather disturbing trend these days. Even among psychologists, more and more authors in the blogosphere have begun to dabble in a form of writing that seems more like personal venting than informal professional guidance. It’s unconscionable. But don’t worry; I have some ideas about how to fix it all. You see, it all comes down to my back problems.

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